This was such a rich post that I have come back it several times. Full disclosure: it was just kind of observing and self-observing that has informed much of Josette and my work in Natural Learning Relationship. (More that on the website.)
Just the term "What Organizes Itself" opens us in so many ways. It undermines power-over dynamics. It allows us to breath Nature and ourselves as natural for Nature is obviously self organizing in minute and macro balances to allow life.
The term "self-organizes" is crucial. Prigogyne won the Noble prize in 1969 when he discovered that molecules self-organize when given a nurturing environment. I won't go through the radical changes this has brought to science. Suffice to say thats systems self organize to greater complexity when appropriately nurtured.
In other words, humans are open systems. We do not have to do anything except provide the proper nurturing environments for the developmental moment of children.
Thank you. The idea of self-organisation sits very close to the heart of how I increasingly understand children and development.
It radically it shifts the question, because if development is something that must be produced, shaped, and driven by adults, then intervention naturally becomes our primary tool. But if children are self-organising systems, the question becomes less "How do I make this happen?" and more "What conditions support it, and what conditions interfere with it?"
For me, that is one of the most profound reframes. It doesn't remove the role of the adult, but it changes the nature of it. We move from directing development towards creating the conditions in which it can unfold.
Perhaps that's why we both arrived at the term "Natural Learning". It points towards a trust that something important is already trying to happen.
I so resonate with so much of your insight, and dare I say, wisdom. Your previous post centering on energy centres as way to decondition strikes me in two ways. First, acknowledgement of the primacy of deconditioning for well-being in the family and education. Then, more deeply, taking us through the specifics of well-being in each energy centre and the confusions and conditionings attendant when they are not known for the greatness they inhere.
And now this post taking us deeper in the dynamics of attention and control. I especially enjoy the way you describe self-observation as central to awareness of when control sneaks in. While clearly inferred that self-observation is available to everyone I would like to make it more explicit. I have participated in bringing self-observation forth for many over many years and often find folks them unfamiliar with this nature human capacity.
I repeat: natural human capacity. I live with this aphorism: capacities are innate; development depends upon relationship. My work centers on the consciousness of children. And so the critical question: what kinds of relationships with children bring forth the actualization of self-observation?
I have a viable response to that question. And the joy of participating with children self-observing. Of course, within their developmental capacities.
To the point of your posts, the question arises fo how to bring it forth in adults when they have not had the relationships which nurture self-observation? For the adults are the central relationships for the children. I have struggled with that for years with varied success. I see your posts as reminders for adults and wish you and all the readers every success to be able to implement that which you have shared.
Thank you so much. There is a lot in your comment that I find myself reflecting on. In particular your question about the kinds of relationships that bring forth self-observation in children.
Much of what has drawn us towards prioritising connection, relationship, spaciousness, self-direction, and a less interventionist approach with our own children has always carried an underlying hope that they might grow up deeply connected to themselves — able to notice their own experience, trust it, reflect on it, and remain in relationship with who they are. I’ve been reflecting and writing a lot on why this is so important and what gets in the way, yet I haven’t explored much around how self-observation itself optimally develops. I guess because there are so few examples around (not the cultural norm) and it often feels like we are “living the experiment”. Your comment has me wondering more deeply about the role of relationship in bringing these capacities forth. Children may well be born with different developmental and consciousness patterns, but I find myself wondering how much the adult’s way of being with them helps them stay connected to themselves, and therefore supports the unfolding of their innate capacities and potential.
I suspect there is a great deal more to explore here. Thank you for giving me something really important to think about.
There is much to say about self-observation in children. Josette and I speak to it in a coming podcast which will be posted June 18. So here I just want to mention a few key points.
First, the elders in the child's life practice self-observation and share those with the child in developmentally appropriate ways.
Second, each field of knowing in a child's development has a unique communication modality. Therefore we invite the child into self-observation according to that modality. Then our communication is a natural, non-intrusive, and relevant to the moment.
Last, when communicating, stay in what interests you, what you are curious about. No agenda, no getting the child to do something, or believe something.
This is a brilliant piece, at every layer of thought.
This paragraph —
“Stepping back, then, is not passive — it’s precise. It means returning to a wider field of attention, where the story is central again and everything else is allowed to organise itself around it. It requires a kind of trust: that what was happening before I intervened was not incomplete, and did not need improving.”
— rings especially true in a meaningfully broad and timeless way. And your subsequent connection of these truths to the relationship between awareness, observation, and directionality in our interactions with children is somehow even more astute.
This was such a rich post that I have come back it several times. Full disclosure: it was just kind of observing and self-observing that has informed much of Josette and my work in Natural Learning Relationship. (More that on the website.)
Just the term "What Organizes Itself" opens us in so many ways. It undermines power-over dynamics. It allows us to breath Nature and ourselves as natural for Nature is obviously self organizing in minute and macro balances to allow life.
The term "self-organizes" is crucial. Prigogyne won the Noble prize in 1969 when he discovered that molecules self-organize when given a nurturing environment. I won't go through the radical changes this has brought to science. Suffice to say thats systems self organize to greater complexity when appropriately nurtured.
In other words, humans are open systems. We do not have to do anything except provide the proper nurturing environments for the developmental moment of children.
Thank you. The idea of self-organisation sits very close to the heart of how I increasingly understand children and development.
It radically it shifts the question, because if development is something that must be produced, shaped, and driven by adults, then intervention naturally becomes our primary tool. But if children are self-organising systems, the question becomes less "How do I make this happen?" and more "What conditions support it, and what conditions interfere with it?"
For me, that is one of the most profound reframes. It doesn't remove the role of the adult, but it changes the nature of it. We move from directing development towards creating the conditions in which it can unfold.
Perhaps that's why we both arrived at the term "Natural Learning". It points towards a trust that something important is already trying to happen.
I so resonate with so much of your insight, and dare I say, wisdom. Your previous post centering on energy centres as way to decondition strikes me in two ways. First, acknowledgement of the primacy of deconditioning for well-being in the family and education. Then, more deeply, taking us through the specifics of well-being in each energy centre and the confusions and conditionings attendant when they are not known for the greatness they inhere.
And now this post taking us deeper in the dynamics of attention and control. I especially enjoy the way you describe self-observation as central to awareness of when control sneaks in. While clearly inferred that self-observation is available to everyone I would like to make it more explicit. I have participated in bringing self-observation forth for many over many years and often find folks them unfamiliar with this nature human capacity.
I repeat: natural human capacity. I live with this aphorism: capacities are innate; development depends upon relationship. My work centers on the consciousness of children. And so the critical question: what kinds of relationships with children bring forth the actualization of self-observation?
I have a viable response to that question. And the joy of participating with children self-observing. Of course, within their developmental capacities.
To the point of your posts, the question arises fo how to bring it forth in adults when they have not had the relationships which nurture self-observation? For the adults are the central relationships for the children. I have struggled with that for years with varied success. I see your posts as reminders for adults and wish you and all the readers every success to be able to implement that which you have shared.
Thank you so much. There is a lot in your comment that I find myself reflecting on. In particular your question about the kinds of relationships that bring forth self-observation in children.
Much of what has drawn us towards prioritising connection, relationship, spaciousness, self-direction, and a less interventionist approach with our own children has always carried an underlying hope that they might grow up deeply connected to themselves — able to notice their own experience, trust it, reflect on it, and remain in relationship with who they are. I’ve been reflecting and writing a lot on why this is so important and what gets in the way, yet I haven’t explored much around how self-observation itself optimally develops. I guess because there are so few examples around (not the cultural norm) and it often feels like we are “living the experiment”. Your comment has me wondering more deeply about the role of relationship in bringing these capacities forth. Children may well be born with different developmental and consciousness patterns, but I find myself wondering how much the adult’s way of being with them helps them stay connected to themselves, and therefore supports the unfolding of their innate capacities and potential.
I suspect there is a great deal more to explore here. Thank you for giving me something really important to think about.
There is much to say about self-observation in children. Josette and I speak to it in a coming podcast which will be posted June 18. So here I just want to mention a few key points.
First, the elders in the child's life practice self-observation and share those with the child in developmentally appropriate ways.
Second, each field of knowing in a child's development has a unique communication modality. Therefore we invite the child into self-observation according to that modality. Then our communication is a natural, non-intrusive, and relevant to the moment.
Last, when communicating, stay in what interests you, what you are curious about. No agenda, no getting the child to do something, or believe something.
Then we are learning and growing together.
Thank you for sharing this. I look forward to listening to the podcast episode :-)
This is a brilliant piece, at every layer of thought.
This paragraph —
“Stepping back, then, is not passive — it’s precise. It means returning to a wider field of attention, where the story is central again and everything else is allowed to organise itself around it. It requires a kind of trust: that what was happening before I intervened was not incomplete, and did not need improving.”
— rings especially true in a meaningfully broad and timeless way. And your subsequent connection of these truths to the relationship between awareness, observation, and directionality in our interactions with children is somehow even more astute.
Thank you deeply for this piece.
Thank you Roxy ❤️ It means so much to me that you gained something from my reflections here 🙏