This is one of the most genuine and practically helpful posts I’ve read this week (I’ve read a bunch of posts, been catching up!) - I had never heard of that app so I will check that out too. I have struggled in the same ways, I often think ‘ooh I’ll take a picture to remember we did this’ or I’ll have some kind of evidence ‘in case we need it’. Yet I’ve had to let go of that very quickly in most areas simply because my son who is 6 has autism, and he is currently not able to write or draw because of how upset he becomes with mistakes (or what he thinks is a mistake). We have had to take a massive step away and simply do what he likes to do. Outings, tiny science experiments, lots of baking, some sticking and crafts that don’t include pens! It has been a learning process for me and I am trying really hard to let go of the voice which keeps saying ‘you’re not doing enough’. After being home educated myself you’d think I’d be more relaxed!! But is shows how deeply in society this is engrained in us.
I really enjoyed this, and getting to know your family education a bit better too. ☺️
Thank you so much — that really means a lot to hear. ❤️ I am very familiar with that voice that keeps saying, “you’re not doing enough.” It’s amazing how persistent it can be, even when we’ve consciously chosen a different path. I also resonated with your son’s experience with writing because my eldest was similar at that age. We stepped right back from it for quite a while too. Looking back now, I really do think taking the pressure away helped. Then, when she started showing signs of readiness, making early writing activities revolve entirely around her own interests made a huge difference. It gradually became something she wanted to do, rather than something she felt she had to do.
Thank you for taking the time to share your experience. I have a feeling many other parents will recognise themselves in what you’ve written.
Thank you for your kindness and reminding me that we really can just adapt learning for our kids, it doesn’t have to look ‘normal’! I should and do really deep down know these things, but sometimes I just need to hear a reminder that it is actually okay! 😄
I’m also so encouraged that we’re not the only ones who accepted they just had to step back and let go of the expectations for a while on things like writing. Thank you!
The need to see the learning and record it is so ingrained in us. And being a teacher, I think I automatically search for the learning in what my daughter is doing. And I often wish I could just let it unfold. I use a similar app and have found it so hopeful to just record a snap shot of an activity or learning so I don't forget. I like keeping the record to look back and see all the amazing learning and activities she has done. But the reality is that I'm doing it in case I ever have to write a report.
My daughter has a similar relationship with make-up. I have never understood her interest in it, especially as I rarely wear make-up. But I think you're right, we often see things through our adult eyes.
Thank you. I so relate to what you say about searching for the learning — I think that instinct runs incredibly deep. I’ve noticed that many of us who have backgrounds in education and now home educate seem to be carrying the same tension. We’ve often stepped away because we’ve seen the limitations of reducing learning to what can be measured or recorded, yet it’s remarkable how long those habits of seeing can stay with us. Letting go of them has been much slower than I expected.
Ah you have a fellow make up lover then! It’s an interesting one to deal with isn’t it, at such a young age. Especially when she has friends of the same age who aren’t the slightest bit interested! But it was one of those opportunities that made me realise how quickly I was seeing it through my own adult lens rather than hers. 😊 And thank you — the little bed is still one of my favourite creations too!
Thank you for this. Those little creations are just delightful and beautiful. I love miniature worlds and hers are magical.
You made me stop and think about "What is mathematics?" I used to teach maths and still I had to pause. I would say mathematics is a language that is used to describe the world. But it also describes things that don't have any existence beyond models in our minds, such as points and lines and planes. And then we manipulate these models to learn more about the world. I love that about maths. I read recently about a culture where they had no numbers - they had one and they had more than one. Sorry - off in my own world here!
Thank you Davina ❤️ I’m so glad you enjoyed it. I loved what you said about her creations — they really do have a kind of magic about them ☺️ I appreciate hearing your reflections on maths. It made me realise that asking “What is mathematics?” is such an interesting question in itself because we might never stop to ask it… we inherit a definition without really examining it. I also love your description of mathematics as a language for describing the world — and then, intriguingly, for describing ideas that exist only in our minds. That’s given me something else to think about! Never apologise for wandering off into your own world, that’s often where the most interesting conversations begin 😊
H I do follow and write when I can. At the moment Ruby, 20 year old granddaughter has her first meaningful paramour visiting. Just met him. And event for everyone for sure.
Of course I was thrilled to read this comment:
Perhaps what I’ve really been searching for isn’t a curriculum at all, but a developmental compass — one that honours the uniqueness of each child while still helping us recognise where they are, how they are growing and what they might be ready for next.
Ba, this means such a lot — thank you. Reading that line back through your eyes has reminded me why I’ve been meaning to spend more time with your work. It feels like one of those lovely moments of synchronicity, as though our thinking has been circling the same questions from different directions. I have a feeling there’s a lot for me to learn there.
This is a beautiful reminder that to look off the prescribed path and beyond the numbers. It's one of the best parts of homeschooling and one I truly embraced when my kids were younger. But as we have arrived in the high school years it has become difficult to stay true to our original homeschooling ideals. I've written quite a bit this past year about navigating high school and college admission expectations while maintaining our sense of self. I'm always grateful for another perspective on this and a gentle reminder!
Thank you so much for reading and commenting, and I’m glad these reflections held value for you. Yes, I can imagine how things must shift as children reach the later parts of childhood, where external expectations become harder to ignore and perhaps more essential for the next phase. I’ll take a look at your writing as I love reading about other’s journeys, especially when they are further along a similar path :-)
This is one of the most genuine and practically helpful posts I’ve read this week (I’ve read a bunch of posts, been catching up!) - I had never heard of that app so I will check that out too. I have struggled in the same ways, I often think ‘ooh I’ll take a picture to remember we did this’ or I’ll have some kind of evidence ‘in case we need it’. Yet I’ve had to let go of that very quickly in most areas simply because my son who is 6 has autism, and he is currently not able to write or draw because of how upset he becomes with mistakes (or what he thinks is a mistake). We have had to take a massive step away and simply do what he likes to do. Outings, tiny science experiments, lots of baking, some sticking and crafts that don’t include pens! It has been a learning process for me and I am trying really hard to let go of the voice which keeps saying ‘you’re not doing enough’. After being home educated myself you’d think I’d be more relaxed!! But is shows how deeply in society this is engrained in us.
I really enjoyed this, and getting to know your family education a bit better too. ☺️
Thank you so much — that really means a lot to hear. ❤️ I am very familiar with that voice that keeps saying, “you’re not doing enough.” It’s amazing how persistent it can be, even when we’ve consciously chosen a different path. I also resonated with your son’s experience with writing because my eldest was similar at that age. We stepped right back from it for quite a while too. Looking back now, I really do think taking the pressure away helped. Then, when she started showing signs of readiness, making early writing activities revolve entirely around her own interests made a huge difference. It gradually became something she wanted to do, rather than something she felt she had to do.
Thank you for taking the time to share your experience. I have a feeling many other parents will recognise themselves in what you’ve written.
Thank you for your kindness and reminding me that we really can just adapt learning for our kids, it doesn’t have to look ‘normal’! I should and do really deep down know these things, but sometimes I just need to hear a reminder that it is actually okay! 😄
I’m also so encouraged that we’re not the only ones who accepted they just had to step back and let go of the expectations for a while on things like writing. Thank you!
The need to see the learning and record it is so ingrained in us. And being a teacher, I think I automatically search for the learning in what my daughter is doing. And I often wish I could just let it unfold. I use a similar app and have found it so hopeful to just record a snap shot of an activity or learning so I don't forget. I like keeping the record to look back and see all the amazing learning and activities she has done. But the reality is that I'm doing it in case I ever have to write a report.
My daughter has a similar relationship with make-up. I have never understood her interest in it, especially as I rarely wear make-up. But I think you're right, we often see things through our adult eyes.
And I love the little bed she has made.
Thank you. I so relate to what you say about searching for the learning — I think that instinct runs incredibly deep. I’ve noticed that many of us who have backgrounds in education and now home educate seem to be carrying the same tension. We’ve often stepped away because we’ve seen the limitations of reducing learning to what can be measured or recorded, yet it’s remarkable how long those habits of seeing can stay with us. Letting go of them has been much slower than I expected.
Ah you have a fellow make up lover then! It’s an interesting one to deal with isn’t it, at such a young age. Especially when she has friends of the same age who aren’t the slightest bit interested! But it was one of those opportunities that made me realise how quickly I was seeing it through my own adult lens rather than hers. 😊 And thank you — the little bed is still one of my favourite creations too!
Thank you for this. Those little creations are just delightful and beautiful. I love miniature worlds and hers are magical.
You made me stop and think about "What is mathematics?" I used to teach maths and still I had to pause. I would say mathematics is a language that is used to describe the world. But it also describes things that don't have any existence beyond models in our minds, such as points and lines and planes. And then we manipulate these models to learn more about the world. I love that about maths. I read recently about a culture where they had no numbers - they had one and they had more than one. Sorry - off in my own world here!
Thank you Davina ❤️ I’m so glad you enjoyed it. I loved what you said about her creations — they really do have a kind of magic about them ☺️ I appreciate hearing your reflections on maths. It made me realise that asking “What is mathematics?” is such an interesting question in itself because we might never stop to ask it… we inherit a definition without really examining it. I also love your description of mathematics as a language for describing the world — and then, intriguingly, for describing ideas that exist only in our minds. That’s given me something else to think about! Never apologise for wandering off into your own world, that’s often where the most interesting conversations begin 😊
A culture where they have no numbers. This sounds so interesting and I would love to know more about it.
H I do follow and write when I can. At the moment Ruby, 20 year old granddaughter has her first meaningful paramour visiting. Just met him. And event for everyone for sure.
Of course I was thrilled to read this comment:
Perhaps what I’ve really been searching for isn’t a curriculum at all, but a developmental compass — one that honours the uniqueness of each child while still helping us recognise where they are, how they are growing and what they might be ready for next.
And that sums up my life's work succinctly.
Made a joyful day more joyful.
Ba, this means such a lot — thank you. Reading that line back through your eyes has reminded me why I’ve been meaning to spend more time with your work. It feels like one of those lovely moments of synchronicity, as though our thinking has been circling the same questions from different directions. I have a feeling there’s a lot for me to learn there.
This is a beautiful reminder that to look off the prescribed path and beyond the numbers. It's one of the best parts of homeschooling and one I truly embraced when my kids were younger. But as we have arrived in the high school years it has become difficult to stay true to our original homeschooling ideals. I've written quite a bit this past year about navigating high school and college admission expectations while maintaining our sense of self. I'm always grateful for another perspective on this and a gentle reminder!
Thank you so much for reading and commenting, and I’m glad these reflections held value for you. Yes, I can imagine how things must shift as children reach the later parts of childhood, where external expectations become harder to ignore and perhaps more essential for the next phase. I’ll take a look at your writing as I love reading about other’s journeys, especially when they are further along a similar path :-)
I love your reflections Gem, and what you do for your children.
It is so beautiful to watch them grow through your perspective.
And yes, it made me ponder more about the deeper meaning of math.
Lastly, you are giving your children a beautiful gift of learning.